Once upon a time, there was an issue of Nightwing titled "Modern Romance," in which Selina Kyle (Catwoman) married Batman...and then she woke up, and subsequently tried to use Nightwing to make Batman jealous.

[info]cereta and I think there was more to it than the comic showed. Also, we're completely incapable of making up our minds. Thus, these are stories of what might have happened next. If you want to read the original comic first, it's available here.

So, first we thought maybe the story continued like this: Post Modern Romance: Variation I, by cereta (1,551 words)

But then we thought... maybe it went like this...

Post Modern Romance: Variation II
by elynross

Dick had nearly forgotten about the whole thing until he was in Gotham a couple weeks later. Telling Bruce made him laugh all over again, the idea that Bruce would be jealous of him--

"She did what?" There was an odd note in Bruce's voice, almost surprised, for him, and it just made Dick laugh harder.

"She kissed me! Of course, then she bit me--"

"She bit you?"

"Not while she was kissing me, she-- Look, I thought she was part of Freddy Minh's plan to get the diamond, but she was there on her own, which I should have figured. So I'm watching the men he did hire, figuring they'll keep her from getting involved--"

Bruce made a muffled sound that might have been a laugh, and Dick glared.

"Okay, so, yeah, stupid. Anyway, suddenly she... slips. Which should have made me suspicious, now that I think of it, but... So, I grab her, of course, and next thing I know we're down on the catwalk -- heh -- and she has her legs wrapped around-- You okay?"

Bruce coughed again and nodded, motioning for Dick to continue.

"--so I'm trapped, there are heavily armed thugs just below us, and she's kissing me-- What?"

"You couldn't have stopped her?"

Dick grinned wickedly. "She caught me off-guard."

Bruce raised an eyebrow, and Dick laughed.

"So then I point out that this is neither the time or place--"

"You mean there would be a right time and place," Bruce growled, and Dick blinked at him.

"No, I didn't mean-- What, you know I'm not...I mean, she's totally hot, sure--" Bruce's face just got grimmer and grimmer, and Dick flushed and stopped, his gut twisting. "I guess she was right."

"Right about what?" Bruce asked, and he didn't sound any happier.

Dick just shook his head, surprised, and more than a little irritated, mostly at himself. "She told me not to tell you, but she obviously wanted me to tell you. I thought it was pretty funny, the idea that you'd be jealous of me, but I guess--" He shrugged, his good mood shot. Then he grinned, and hoped it looked real. "I'll have to hunt her up and tell her it worked."

"That?" Bruce said, with another raised eyebrow, "would be a very bad idea." He turned back to the computers, clearly done with the conversation.

"Oooookay. I'll just-- I'm gonna go take a shower." He'd just go soak his head, is what he'd do. He'd fought his attraction to Bruce for years, and he'd thought he was over it, and yet all it took was Bruce showing real interest in someone like Selina, and Dick was tied up in jealous knots. Selina's kiss had left him cold, but he'd expected Bruce to be amused at the transparent attempt to make Batman jealous, not--

He'd just wanted to make Bruce laugh.

The water was hot, the pressure hard, and Dick closed his eyes as it beat down on his shoulders, tilting his head back into the spray. When he opened them, Bruce was standing just inside the doorway, watching him, a towel fisted in place around his hips, washcloth in his other hand. Wordlessly, Bruce moved to the opposite shower, turning his back and tossing his towel aside before turning the shower on full. Dick winced at the thought of the blasting cold water.

He idly washed his hair, letting his gaze drift over Bruce's body, figuring he could close his eyes before Bruce could turn around and catch him staring. He'd seen Bruce in all conditions and states of nudity, but it had been a while since he'd actually let himself see his nakedness. For some reason, Bruce's reaction to Dick's story made him more aware than he had been in a long time.

"I'm sorry," he said, impulsively, more to break the silence than anything.

Bruce stilled in washing his arms. "About?"

"I shouldn't have said anything. It didn't mean anything, not to me, and certainly not to her." Bruce bent over, washing his leg, and all Dick could do was stare at his ass. "I mean, actually, it's pretty unflattering to me, if you think about it, trying to use me to get to you, and you know, I didn't think you'd actually be jealous, and it's not like I would have--" Dick realized that he'd started babbling, so he stopped.

"What," Bruce said, standing up, back still turned, "makes you so sure I'm jealous--"

Dick rolled his eyes, even though Bruce couldn't see him. "You have to admit, you're acting--"

"--of you?"

It took Dick a few seconds to parse that. "Oh. Oh. I." He blinked. "Oh."

Bruce's shoulders were rigid, and he was just letting the shower pour over him. Dick wanted to lick up the water running down his back.

"Is this a problem?" Bruce's tone was coolly neutral, with only a hint of stress, which for him indicated high anxiety.

Dick licked his lips nervously. "No. Absolutely not. Farthest thing from it, in fact. I mean, this is possibly the most non-problematic thing that's happened to me lately, and I know from problems." He kept talking, babbling again, but with intent this time, as Bruce's shoulders visibly relaxed. "You know, really, we, um. We should think about conserving water," he said, and held his breath.

Bruce went still again, but it was a different kind of stillness, and then he turned and Dick could see that he was half-hard already, and Dick couldn't have breathed if he wanted to.

"Will it get you to shut up?" Bruce asked with a slight smile.

"Maybe if my mouth were otherwise occupied..." Dick said with only the slightest tremor.

Bruce's eyes widened slightly. He dropped his washcloth and walked towards Dick, moving slowly. When he reached him, he put his hand out. Dick blinked and looked down, and realized he was holding his soap in front of him, in both hands. He dropped it into Bruce's outstretched palm, and Bruce put it in the soap dish before taking Dick's hands in his and rinsing the soap off of them, spreading Dick's fingers and sliding his own between them to catch every slick spot.

Dick stared at their intertwined, moving hands, mesmerized, and therefore caught off-guard when Bruce grasped both Dick's hands in one of his own and turned him so that Bruce's chest was pressed to his back, the water beating down on them both.

Dick could feel Bruce hot and hard against him, and licked his lips. Bruce widened his stance and pulled Dick in tighter, hands still held immobile. He slid his other hand to Dick's belly and started rubbing it in small circles, then bent his head to Dick's ear, licking delicately along the edge, along the whorls, before sucking the lobe into his mouth, making Dick groan.

"How long?" Bruce breathed into his ear, then licked more firmly. "How long have you wanted this, and I didn't know?"

"Uh, maybe-- years? God. I don't-- Do that again."

Bruce bit his earlobe sharply, and Dick jerked against his restraining arm.

"Or that'll work, too..." He moaned as Bruce fucked his ear with his tongue, then licked and bit his way along Dick's throat, still making those firm, steady circles on Dick's belly, and lower, but never quite low enough, carding his fingers through the hair trailing downward.

"Turn your head," Bruce said softly, then licked his way up the front of Dick's throat, sucking on his Adam's apple, kissing softly over his jaw before capturing his mouth in a deep kiss at the same moment as he slid his hand down and wrapped it firmly around Dick's cock.

Dick bucked again, held more by Bruce's mouth and the touch of his body than his actual grip. The kiss was wet and messy and hard, water splashing in their faces, and Bruce used his tongue like he used his hand, to hold Dick captive, to destroy what little mind he had left.

Bruce was still kissing him when Dick came, and kept working his cock until Dick was whimpering and begging. Then he wrapped both arms tight around him and bit right where his neck met his shoulder, his cock still hard against Dick's ass.

Dick took several deep breaths, rubbing his jaw against Bruce's cheek. "Wow."

"Mmmm," Bruce rumbled against his skin, squeezing tighter.

Dick slipped his arms loose, and Bruce let him now. He laid them over Bruce's and squeezed back, briefly, then turned in the circle of his arms, brushing against Bruce's cock as he moved.

Bruce tried to stop him as he went to his knees. "Dick, you don't have to--"

Dick looked up and laughed. "Are you kidding me? Not everything is about you, you know."

The water splashed over him as he licked the head of Bruce's cock, then closed his mouth around the tip, enjoying the give and heat of flesh against his tongue. He wrapped one hand around the base, groaning as Bruce slid a hand into his hair, holding his head firmly, resting his other hand on Dick's shoulder. He could raise his eyes just enough to see Bruce staring down at him, lips parted.

He grazed his teeth lightly against Bruce's skin, and was rewarded with a jerk and a deep groan. Noting the reaction, he started licking and sucking in earnest, closing his eyes and fisting Bruce's cock at the same time, listening to the sounds Bruce made, palming his ass with his other hand.

Giving a blow job was almost as much of a turn-on for Dick as for his partner, and it only got better when Bruce lost control enough to catch his hand in Dick's hair and use it to set a rhythm. Dick groaned and followed as best he could, swallowing and humming against the hard flesh fucking his mouth.

When Bruce came, Dick swallowed, choking slightly. Then he fell back on one hand, wiping the corner of his mouth with his thumb, grinning up at a dazed-looking Bruce.

"So, I may have to hunt her up and thank her," he said lazily. "Not exactly what she had in mind, I'm sure, but..."

Bruce held out a hand and hauled him to his feet, catching him in close and kissing him thoroughly. Dick shivered at the thought of Bruce tasting himself in Dick's mouth.

"That," Bruce said, with a slight smile, "would be a very bad idea. Her claws aren't just for show, you know."

"Mmmmm," Dick said. "But it might be worth it for the look on her face."

Bruce reached for the soap, working up a lather and starting to rub Dick's back.

Dick closed his eyes. "So... You really didn't know?"

"Didn't know what?"

"How I felt." Dick opened his eyes to see Bruce looking down at him, seriously.

"No. You hid it very well."

"Maybe I shouldn't have done such a good job of it. Think of the water we could have saved."

Bruce looked over his shoulder to where the other shower was still running, then back at Dick.

"Can I help it if you're forgetful?"

Bruce swatted his ass, and Dick grinned. Clearly sex relaxed Bruce in heretofore unexpected and highly to be encouraged ways.

"Hey. Do that again."


"Entirely." Dick picked up the soap himself, and they traded it back and forth, washing each other clean.

"So..." Dick said. "How long for you? And why now?"

Bruce turned off the water, and walked over to pick up a towel, looking thoughtful. "Since you were seventeen."

Dick blinked. "I never knew."

"You weren't supposed to." Bruce dried himself quickly, then started toweling Dick dry more slowly, going to his knees to dry one leg, then the other.

"Why not?"

Bruce leaned in to press his mouth to Dick's stomach. Dick stroked his hand over Bruce's wet hair, and Bruce rested his cheek against him. "I saw you one day, when you were seventeen, I don't even remember where we were, but you had this smile on your face, and you were practically dancing with nervous tension and excitement, and... I wanted you. Badly." There was something raw in his voice, and Dick pressed his hand against Bruce's cheek.

Bruce shook his head, and stood up to continue drying Dick off. "You were so young. Not immature," he said, forestalling the objection Dick hadn't quite decided to make, "but young. It rattled me, deeply. I wasn't supposed to want you...so I didn't."

Dick blinked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, I stopped. I didn't allow myself to see you as a sexual being. At all."

Dick stopped him and looked in his face. "How, exactly, do you do that?"

Bruce grinned, and it was full of edges. "I'm Batman. And I couldn't allow it to interfere with the mission."

Dick nodded, because somehow it made sense. "And now? It's not like this is the first time you've been made aware of my... sexual nature."

Bruce's grin softened, but was no less predatory. "Who says I just noticed tonight?"

"Avoiding the question," Dick said mockingly.

"I... honestly don't know." Bruce sounded uncomfortable.

Dick raised an eyebrow.

"Maybe it's been coming for a while. Maybe because it was Selina, who's known you almost as long as I have." He looked into Dick's eyes, and his voice got low and deep. "Maybe because I walked into the showers tonight and saw you standing there, and I knew that I had to touch you, and I didn't let myself think about why it wasn't a good idea."

Dick swallowed. "Yeah. Okay. Um, that'll do."


"Oh, yeah."

"Good. And the next time some strange woman tries to kiss you?" Bruce slapped the towel around Dick's hips and pulled him in close.


"Try a little harder to stop her."

"But it worked out so well this--"

"Dick," Bruce said warningly.

Dick grinned and lifted his mouth for a kiss. Maybe he'd just send Selina a dozen roses. Anonymously.

Many thanks to [info]cereta, in particular, for support, connivance, and kind but firm beta, and to [info]marycrawford, [info]aka_arduinna, and Dorinda, for kind words, and beta!

In this place there is silence, like a well where dropped wishes never touch water. In this place we move through lighted rooms and see nothing but the shadows. In this place the gods are all dead, ages dead and dust and aether and man is but a momentary thing, a dream half-dreamt before waking. In this place we stand shoulder to shoulder and steal each the other's breath, yet want nothing more than to be touched. In this place everything is laid bare to the world ... --Brighid

Accompanies Variation I, by Lucy Gillam,
and is followed by Variation III, by Lucy Gillam, and Variation IV by elynross.
Feedback? Please, to elynross.